What an unforgettable weekend!

I don't even know where to start (or end for that matter). I'm certainly not going to go into grave detail here (mostly because I really can't given the players involved in the madness). I will however give you the cliff notes version...as always, no real names will be used. You'll have to 'read between the lines' on this one!

We (myself and 2 other gals...everyone else bailed on us!) arrive Friday night at the party location. We arrive a tad later than we were supposed but none the less we were the ONLY ones there. We gave each other a puzzled looked and decided to give it a half hour to see what happens. Oh...it happened! Within about 15 minutes a few groups of people showed up but still no legends. About 5 minutes later the limos started pulling up...it took 2 minutes to turn a near empty bar into the COOLEST place in the country to be for the next few hours. It was elbow to elbow Legends. Legit! The best part...I felt short!!! Usually I'm one of the tallest people (for sure girl) in the bar. I had worn my big girl heels for a reason. One of the gals with me (we'll call her "S") is only about 5'2. We laughed at that fact that no one could really see her. Enough about that...you don't need to know about how I felt, you want to hear about what happened....

It was pretty amazing just to sit back and watch, listen to conversations, and just chat with everyone. One guy came up and introduced himself to the 3 of us pretty early on. I had absolutely no clue who he was, but I was about to find. We was the "main event's" personal assistant. This little guy from Boston. Apparently we passed inspection (they had to make sure we weren't some crazy groupies I suppose).  So at some point I head to the bathroom. I walked out and there was a small group huddled together. It included a current coach (the big cheese) and some past players. The Big Cheese (BC) grabbed me and asks this little group if they had met me. He knew I had graduated about the same time as all of them. He introduces to me to them as "the greatest diver ever in the State of KS". Really? Not quite, but I didn't mind that introduction. After all, standing in this group was 3 VERY well known 'legends'. There was one guy standing there who looked familiar but I couldn't place his name. After spending about 10 minutes talking to them I excused myself. Not long after, here came the nameless guy. He told me he
"finally figured out who I was" (WTF...I'm trying to figure out who all you people are). We graduated about the same time and he went on to tell me how he had a huge crush on me in college. Again, WTF. I don't really even remember him. I was pretty dumbfounded that he remembered me. It was pretty cool. And so was he. We'll just call him BT. I found out he lives in the area and from what I can gather is single. Might get interesting!

So we left the party about 2 hours in. Everyone was headed to yet another 'party'. This one however was at an absolutely packed to the gills with college students 'dance club'. We were quickly escorted to the 'private room' that was not so private and not so much of a room. It literally felt like a dungeon. Complete with cut outs in the stone walls with huge openings to the rest of the bar. Those openings were quickly filled with tons of faces (and camera phones) peering in to the 'who's who in basketball history'. I felt pretty honored to be in that room. I pretty much sat back with BT and just watched the comedy ensue. But like every good party...it had to end. It was one of those nights you want to relive over and over and over again. We hung for a little while, exchanged some numbers and off we went.

Saturday brought a whole new day of adventures. Somewhat similar to Friday night. I'm tired of typing so you're just going to have to wait for part 2 later!!!

I'll leave you with one very VERY blurry picture taken on Fri night during a little speech/toast that someone was giving...

FREAK OF THE WEEK!

It's Friday....that means FREAK OF THE WEEK time!

I have a two this week...

Up first, we have "my wedding picture will make a great profile pic for Match.com". Enough said:

I'm not even going to start on the actual people in the picture. A closer look and I think I just may have found Willy Wonka's missing umpa-loompa. Enough.

And then there's this guy. It looks likes a scene out of Something About Mary gone all wrong:

What would actually make him think this is a good picture to attract women? And furthermore, the whole idea is to post pictures from this decade on your profile. If you're going to post a picture that is 5 years old, for god's sake take the date tag off it!  The sad thing is, the rest of his pictures are pretty decent. 

Gotta run...getting ready for the big 'party' tonight.  :)

PS: Douche bag wasn't at the event last night...apparently he had to stay in Arizona to "talk to people" a little longer than initially thought. Baahwahwawa! 

UPDATE:

I prematurely posted... I hadn't even made it through all of that guy's pictures and I found this little jewel: 

As if the first one wasn't gross enough! 

Random Updates

It's been a few since I've updated...partly because I've been super busy and partly because the stories haven't been all too exciting. I do have some fun updates though (and some really exciting things on the plate for this weekend!). Here goes...

F-head got back in town late Thurs night. I really didn't get a chance to talk to him until swim lesson Monday. Yes, every week we both attend L's swim lesson. It's a blessing and curse. The good thing is we get to sit down for a half hour every week and catch either up on what's going on, our schedules for the upcoming weeks, etc. So I asked him about his little trip. He is sticking to his original story that he was just in CA. He also went off on a tangent about his girlfriend/fiance/cousin. He actually said, "I would be crazy to get engaged to a cousin in Germany". Really? That's my line. Needless to say, I still don't care. I'm just happy things are back to normal in my life.

So the married dude is apparently back from 'rehab'.  And I apparently might see him tonight. I can't wait!!! I get to call him out in person. I'm certainly not going to make a spectacle of it as we'll be at an industry function however, I'm going to make the bastard squirm.

So big plans this weekend....on Saturday KU is having this little 'legends of the phog' game were they are bringing back a lot of the former players that went on to the NBA. The majority are current NBA players that are able to come due to the lock out. We (meaning me and some other girlfriends) have been invited to a private little party on Friday night with with all the players and coaches. Don't ask how we got invited, just be jealous. We are also going to go to the actual game on Saturday. Should have some great stories after this weekend!

A dating update... (figure I have to do this): I've now been on Match about 2 weeks and have honestly not had any emails/winks (which are ridiculous...it's like making eye contact with a girl at a bar and never getting the balls to actually go talk to her). That changed a little this week. I got an email for a guy that seemed half interesting. We talked (yes, actually had a real, live conversation) for the first time last night. Oh yes, we talked. For almost 2 hours!!! I hung up my phone and looked at the call timer and couldn't believe it. He was more than half interesting....he actually managed to hold my attention for longer than 20 minutes. I not holding my breath but we'll see what develops with this one. More later!

Finkle is Einhorm...Einhorn is Finkle.

So I finally heard from F-head (I refrain from using his real name as I do from using any real names. F-head is by far the easiet and most efficient name for him...plus it's not really THAT far off from his real name ). He emailed me to offer his apologies for not being in touch the past 3 weeks. He apparently was somewhere in the world with no internet or phone access. Funny...because you managed to break up with girlfriend at some point during the past 3 weeks and if you weren't in Germany and didn't have phone and internet then you must have some mad skills. You'd be proud... I sent back a scathing email telling him 'sorry' wasn't going to cut it. He's shown total disregard for his responsibilities with his child..blah blah blah. He responded and told me I could have easily called his mothers' home if there was an emergency and that I didn't need to go around emailing his sister and contacting his cousin, and..

WAIT! Back the truck up... YOUR COUSIN??? TIME THE F OUT. The only 2 people I had 'contact' with was his sister (I finally emailed her Monday to ask if she knew how I might to able to reach our little world traveler) and his girlfriend. And for the record, the girlfriend contacted me. I just took the opportunity to find out if she by chance knew where he was. So...if I'm reading into this situation correctly, Finkle is Einhorn... Einhord is Finkle. COUSIN=GIRLFRIEND, GIRLFRIEND=COUSIN. Oh holy hell. Only in my world. Apparently the practice of marrying your cousins in not just confined to Arkansas. When, oh when, are these idiots going to learn that marrying your cousin is just not smart. Here we go again...18 degrees of crazy.

I'm just going to go back to regularly scheduled programming called my life and continue along my happy little way and attempt to ignore the complete shit show going on around me. Thank you and I hope you have a lovely day.

Participation Medals

Who doesn't love a great crazy ex story. I will preface this by saying our relationship has improved ten-fold over the past 12 months. We can actually have meaningful conversations that extend beyond just "what time did L eat?". However, he still does stupid stuff. I thinks it's inherent.

I mean who the in hell thinks it's a good idea to leave town for 3 weeks and not tell their ex a) where they are going and b) how to get a hold of him. This is the 2nd (yes, 2nd) time in the last 6 months the idiot has done this. I mean really? News flash...you have a CHILD. I could give a shit where you are and what you are doing but for god's sake if something were to happen it would probably be in your best interest for me to be able to get a hold you. I have suspicions that he's out of the country visiting his 23 year old girlfriend that lives overseas. Why he feels the need to keep these things from me is beyond me. I told him 2 months I hope he finds happiness and gets remarried.

So this morning I received a FB email from her telling me it's over between them. Girlfriend, you are not the first and probably won't be the last poor sap that has contacted me because they got their heart broken by him and now you think he's crazy. Newsflash...I've known he's crazy for years. Why in the hell do these women feel the need to reach out to me? Do you think I'm going to give them a participation medal? Sorry, I already walked away with the winning trophy 4 years ago when the divorced was finalized.

And so it goes...

Might as well...

I can't resist starting this up again. The stories are too good for others not to be laughing with me (and maybe you'll laugh at me). I recently threw myself back into the "awesome"(you can't hear my sarcasm but it's there!) world of match.com. The story of how I ended back on there is probably better than any that have resulted in my 5 days back on that site. And don't worry, 'freak of the week' will be returning!

So how did I wind up back on there? This summer hasn't been the best in regards to my love life. Every guy I meet turns out to be either a) be married (and they don't bother to tell me) or b) going to meetings to 'make themselves better' (or in some cases both). WTH. I thought back in May I had finally met the perfect guy. Things were going great but he started acting strange. Not being the shy type, I asked him what the deal was. If he wasn't 'feeling it' I certainly didn't want to waste my time. I'm a big girl...I handle rejection with the best of them. He assured me he truly liked me a lot and wasn't expecting to find someone like me so soon after his divorce. He wanted to take things slow. Great. Well that translated into me seeing him, oh I don't know, ONCE over the summer. We stayed in pretty constant contact over texts (he's apparently afraid to actually dial numbers and hear a live voice on the other end). Finally about 4 weeks ago I emailed him and said something to effect of: "look, I don't know where you stand, but I have interest in you but feel like I'm being led on. You keep saying you want to see me then we never make actual plans. If you don't feel the same way, for gods sake, just tell me and I'll move on". He responded very quickly and told me: "I have a ton of interest in you. I think about you often and want to be together....however I am a broken person and attending meetings to make myself better. It's going to take time and if you can be patient great, if not, I understand". I responded and told him I understood and was willing to be patient. That was roughly 4 weeks ago. Aside from the sporadic texts I really haven't heard from him since then. Silence...until last Friday... so I'm back on match.com, minding my own business and guess who decides to 'wink' at me? Really? A wink on match.com. DB. I have to keep faith though in that there is someone even better out there.... NEXT.....

So somewhere along the line this summer I met this other guy. We had fun hanging out...seemed to have quite a few common interests. We had a lot of mutual acquaintances and friends (we kind of work in the same industry). And then the red flags started flying like bullets. It was quite obvious he wasn't even close to having his shit together amongst other things. I decided to lay off and that maybe it would be best with so many mutual friends and a business relationship that we just keep it at the friend level. And it's a damn good thing I did....I found out this weekend that, surprise, he's still married (not exactly the story he told me). Oh, and he's spending most of September taking a 3 week 'vacation' to 'talk to some people about a potential gambling issue". IE...he's in rehab....for the 2nd time.

I mean really? Can I not freaking catch a break?